Catharsis

Last week Wednesday, an Orchard Park graduate and Geneseo student was walking on a street in Geneseo, NY when she walked into the road and was struck by a semi truck. She was a very good friend of one of the staff members I work closely with, and also used to work at the Boys & Girls Club. The community of Orchard Park is small and tight knit and this has rippled down touching everyone. Strangely, on Tuesday, the staff member was speaking of this friend to me, telling me of her promising academic and sports careers. I did not ever have the fortune of meeting this person in life, and find the tragedy of her death haunting. She hung on until some time on Sunday, and the family was able to donate many of her organs.

I can't imagine how this affects members of this girl's family, extended family, friends, her long term boyfriend and his family, anyone who's life this girl touched. I came home and hugged Ellie so tight, and as we sat watching her show before she went to bed that night, all I could think was that's not how things are supposed to go in this life. This is not the way it is supposed to be. How do you look at a child you have loved and nurtured into a beautiful human being and let them go. It's not our choice, I realize this, no one person would make that choice, not ever. The choice becomes picking up the pieces of what remains of your life after losing someone you love.

For people like me, a person on the outside not looking through grief stricken eyes, the choice becomes what do you take away from a tragedy like this. The one thing I personally take from this is to make the most of the time I have with the people I love. I would never expect to always be exempt from hardship or tragedy, and acknowledging this means also being "prepared" to a certain extent for that. It is imperative to me that the people who are important to me know that, they know that they are loved by me, and should there come a point when things are not rosy between myself and anyone I love, I owe it to myself and them to clear it up and move on. Life is too short for grudges, and it is also too short to spend upset and pissed off at the world.

I had someone ask me in regard to this tragedy how you can look at a situation like this and still have faith. I believe that people who have faith, have it through these times. To me, faith is being able to look at a situation, any situation, and see God's hand in it. When people ask "how could God let this happen, what kind of God would let this happen to such good people", I understand. I don't think faith is never questioning or having all the answers, or always being able to see the answers. To me, faith is knowing and trusting that there ARE answers even if you don't know what they are, and might not ever know.

After my Papa passed away, which was to me, the single most devastating loss of my life, I wrote this of death and faith:

"The story of life is punctuated by Death-

Faith allows it not to be an ending such as a period, or question mark, but a place to emphasize with a pause allowing reflection, and then continuation to the end of your story."